Tyler Perry shares painful past on Oprah

Tyler Perry appeared on the Oprah show today to talk in-depth about a childhood riddled with verbal, emotional, physical and sexual abuse. Being a sickly child triggered an abnormal hatred and rage in his father who expressed it by berating and beating his son. Although his mother knew that he was being abused, she was incapable of shielding him since she was beaten and threatened constantly as well, Perry acknowledged.

His story is a powerful one and a testament to many who have suffered abuse that it is possible to overcome such tragic circumstances. Guided through his childhood torment by the exquisitely skillful interviewer and his good friend, Oprah, he told of being unnerved by the mind games his father played. In order to protect himself during brutal beatings, in his mind, he would travel to a park where he once had so much fun. After a particularly vicious beating with a vacuum cleaner hose that left large open welts, Tyler fled to his aunt Jerry's house. She grabbed a gun an confronted his father. She is the inspiration behind his Madea character. One of the saddest parts of his story has Tyler being beaten so mercilessly after his father caught him smirking at him that he could see the little boy (himself) not retreating to the park but instead running away. He said that he died that day. The beating caused him to pass out for three days.

One huge reason Tyler Perry the movie mogul agreed to lay bare his private pain is so that other men who have suffered sexual abuse as children will be able to talk about it and free themselves. At a tender age (5 or 6) his neighbor with whom he was building a bird house or cage put his hand in his pants and without fulling knowing what was happening to him, he experienced an erection. "My body betrayed me," he said. Eventually, a male nurse at the hospital where Perry had been rushed from school did the same thing to him. His third encounter with sexual abuse involved a man from his church who performed oral sex on him and used scriptures from the bible that he had undoubtedly twisted to justify his actions. There was a woman who was the mother of one of his friends who locked him in her house when he attempted to leave, put the key in her vagina and told him that he had to reach in to get it if he wanted to go home. Once he did, he had an erection and the woman pulled him into her to complete her devious plan.

When Oprah asked if he ever told anyone about the sexual abuse, he shared a disgusting story of his father teaching him at an early age that telling would only make things worse for him. A little girl whom Perry liked told him that his father had tried to touch her. One night when she was staying over, he witnessed his father come into the room and try to touch her as she lay in the bed across the room. His father retreated when Tyler turned over in his bed. Tyler told his mother. She packed up the kids and left only to return hours later. His father's physical and verbal abuse got much worse. That was the first and last time that he told.

"You expect as a child that your mother is going to protect you," Oprah said. However, he conceded that his mother was a passive person and that, coupled with the abuse that she was experiencing at the hands of his father, rendered her unable to protect him. As a result, he would spend hours in a crawl space under the house, hiding from the wrath of his own father. "Predators know when a child is an easy mark," he responded when Oprah asked how the other people knew that they could molest him and get away with it.

Perry's years of unbridled abuse caused him to struggle with his sexual identity, intimacy and relationships for a long time. He also had difficulty with issues of anger and rage. When asked how he "acted out" he revealed that he used to make everyone around him miserable, burned down a house, burned his car, and stole things.

"Your father will hear about this show. How do you feel about that?" Oprah inquired.

"I don't care," Perry declared nonchalantly but as a matter of fact. He went on to say that after exposing the abuse in an email to his legions of fans, he received this message from his father sent through his brother.

"If I had beat your ass one more time, you would have been Barack Obama."

In spite of all of the pain he has caused, Perry said that he forgave his father and actually takes care of him. He has provided him with a home and sends monthly checks to him. However, he revealed that he still harbors fear that his father might harm him and therefore refuses to have him in his life.

Oprah said more than once that Tyler Perry was taking a risk by telling such a detailed story of the abuse and degradation he has suffered. I think that he showed a tremendous amount of strength, courage, humility and high character. He has nothing to fear from his fans except an outpouring of love and support that will only be surpassed by their appreciation for giving them the inspiration that they need to tell their own stories.

Predators hide in the dark. That dark, secret place is also their stronghold. It sustains their power and allows them to operate unchecked. It's time for victims to put them in the spotlight so that they will not have the power to hurt anyone else.

Perry's tenth movie, For Colored Girls, will be premiering in November. Join Oprah and Tyler on November 5, 2010 for a special show in which her studio will be filled with 200 men who want to share their stories, how it has changed their lives, and hopefully to heal.